Things that are more important than "protecting marriage:"
Health care
Education
Pollution
Things that are more important than whether I'm a man or a woman:
Our foreign policy
Unemployment
The stock market
Things that are more important than whether or not that girl you don't know is a lesbian:
Police brutality
The Tea Party
The housing market
There are so many things that our country needs to be worrying about right now and the battle against the LGBT community is not one of them. It's unconstitutional, and therefore against everything this country is founded upon, to take civil rights away from or discriminate against any group of citizens. Politicians are only still arguing against gay rights issues because they want to distract you from the real issues. Stop letting politicians jerk you around like a puppet using the strings of your emotions. Let's start focusing on what's really important because we are on a slippery slope. If we can justify taking rights away from even one of our citizens then we can justify taking rights away from all our citizens. All the while, politicians are gaining power over us and passing legislature that cripples us and we don't realize it until it's too late! Wake up to the real issues. Tell your local and federal politicians that we want more rights for all citizens and we won't be passive about politics anymore!
Friday, March 21, 2014
Friday, March 14, 2014
Path of Least Resistance
Not too long ago I took a flight home to see my mom and sisters. This was the very first flight I've ever taken so I was mesmerized by the view. As I was staring out the window I realized that everything man-made is divided into rectangles. If you've ever flown or seen aerial pictures of the world you might be saying, "Uh, yeah, duh!" But I had to ask myself why rectangles? Why haven't we divided our land into circles or triangles or any other shape?
Well the answer is that rectangles are simpler for us. Other shapes are awkward and they don't easily allow for equal division of land. Other shapes don't split into even, equal rows for crops. It's even easier to mow grass if we can go up one side and down the other in a rectangle. Basically, it just makes life easier and we are programmed to want to take the road of least resistance.
It's the same in our social lives as well. We find it important to avoid negative interactions and so we avoid conflict almost to an extreme. This means that in a situation of oppressor and oppressed the oppressed will allow the oppression to continue as long as they can stand. But the longer the discrimination continues the more savage it becomes and the more difficult it becomes to deny it's injustice. Therefore, it is inevitable that a conflict will occur when the oppressed fight to gain or regain equal rights.
We have seen this before in the Civil Rights Movement of the African American community and we are seeing it again in the civil rights struggle of the LGBTQ community. We have been targeted for too long and we will not stand it anymore so we are having to fight for equal rights.
But we would never have to fight each other at all if discrimination did not exist. If no one was ever targeted and victimized then no one would have to struggle for equality and no one else would have to struggle to keep it away. Think of how much energy our country is spending fighting itself. Are we so lost and confused that we have to look into our neighbor's window to find what we are passionate about?
My point is that the true path of least resistance for humankind is to treat everyone with love and respect and never oppress or discriminate against anyone. This way our lives won't be lost to meaningless conflict.
Love_Respect_Equality_Peace.
Well the answer is that rectangles are simpler for us. Other shapes are awkward and they don't easily allow for equal division of land. Other shapes don't split into even, equal rows for crops. It's even easier to mow grass if we can go up one side and down the other in a rectangle. Basically, it just makes life easier and we are programmed to want to take the road of least resistance.
It's the same in our social lives as well. We find it important to avoid negative interactions and so we avoid conflict almost to an extreme. This means that in a situation of oppressor and oppressed the oppressed will allow the oppression to continue as long as they can stand. But the longer the discrimination continues the more savage it becomes and the more difficult it becomes to deny it's injustice. Therefore, it is inevitable that a conflict will occur when the oppressed fight to gain or regain equal rights.
We have seen this before in the Civil Rights Movement of the African American community and we are seeing it again in the civil rights struggle of the LGBTQ community. We have been targeted for too long and we will not stand it anymore so we are having to fight for equal rights.
But we would never have to fight each other at all if discrimination did not exist. If no one was ever targeted and victimized then no one would have to struggle for equality and no one else would have to struggle to keep it away. Think of how much energy our country is spending fighting itself. Are we so lost and confused that we have to look into our neighbor's window to find what we are passionate about?
My point is that the true path of least resistance for humankind is to treat everyone with love and respect and never oppress or discriminate against anyone. This way our lives won't be lost to meaningless conflict.
Love_Respect_Equality_Peace.
Friday, March 7, 2014
Bible and Homosexuality - Sex is Sin
My last post on how Transmen have sex inspired me to create this spin-off about how the Bible relates sex to sin. This is another post in my series on the Bible and homosexuality. I am still working on that series for those of you that are interested so I apologize that it has taken so long to make another post about it. Also, I will be writing about Sodom and Gomorrah soon, I promise.
Basically, my point here will be how absurd it is to condemn a person based on what type of sex they have. Before I even get to what the Bible says I would like to point out just how little we even have sex.
The average person:
Starts having sex at age 17 and stops having sex at age 70 which means they have a sexual life span of 53 years.
During one act of sex has foreplay for 20 minutes and sex for 5 minutes which means the total act lasts 25 minutes.
Has sex 103 times per year.
25 x 103 = 2,572 which is how many minutes per year they will have sex.
2,572 x 53 = 136,475 which is how many minutes they will have sex in a lifetime.
The average person lives 75 years which is 39,446,175 minutes.
136,475 / 39,446,175 = .0034597...
When multiplied by 100 this gives us .345978
So the average person spends only .35% of their life in the act of sex.
So, why are we making it out to be such a big deal? I personally think it is erroneous to condemn someone for an act that they will spend less than 1% of their life doing. And might I mention, it has no affect on anyone else anyway.
Now, lets see what the Bible says. If you look carefully you can see that sex was never part of God's original plan and that sex in itself, no matter who is doing it or how, is a sin. In Genesis Chapter 2 Verse 25 we read that Adam and Eve were both naked and unashamed. From this we gather that they don't know what their nakedness is or what can be done with their naked bodies. In Chapter 3 Verse 7 after Adam and Eve have eaten from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil the "eyes of them both were opened and they knew that they were naked." Then they sewed fig leaves together and covered themselves. Now that they have eaten from the tree and they know what sin is they are ashamed of their bodies because they realize their bodies can be vessels of sin. Later, God asks them why they are hiding their bodies and demands to know if they have eaten from the tree. This tells us that God never intended for Adam and Eve to know what nakedness is or to know what their bodies were capable of. It isn't until Chapter 4 Verse 1 after Adam and Eve have been cast out of the Garden of Eden that they have sex. From this we can conclude that all sex is sinful and God never intended for any of us to have sex.
For those of you who think my logic is flawed because the Bible refers to Adam and Eve as husband and wife and mentions them lying with one another before this happens I would like to point out that the Bible is filled with foreshadowing. Almost everything that happens in the Bible is mentioned at least once before the Bible actually comes to telling its story. In other words, the Bible will allude to things that have not happened yet and will later tell the story in full and explain how the events took place. I find it obvious that's what's happening here as well.
Since sex is sin and no sin can be more sinful than any other sin then it is absurd to condemn anyone based on what type of sex they have. None of us have the right to point fingers and say, "Your sin is worse than mine," we all just need to atone for our own sin and move on with our lives.
Basically, my point here will be how absurd it is to condemn a person based on what type of sex they have. Before I even get to what the Bible says I would like to point out just how little we even have sex.
The average person:
Starts having sex at age 17 and stops having sex at age 70 which means they have a sexual life span of 53 years.
During one act of sex has foreplay for 20 minutes and sex for 5 minutes which means the total act lasts 25 minutes.
Has sex 103 times per year.
25 x 103 = 2,572 which is how many minutes per year they will have sex.
2,572 x 53 = 136,475 which is how many minutes they will have sex in a lifetime.
The average person lives 75 years which is 39,446,175 minutes.
136,475 / 39,446,175 = .0034597...
When multiplied by 100 this gives us .345978
So the average person spends only .35% of their life in the act of sex.
So, why are we making it out to be such a big deal? I personally think it is erroneous to condemn someone for an act that they will spend less than 1% of their life doing. And might I mention, it has no affect on anyone else anyway.
Now, lets see what the Bible says. If you look carefully you can see that sex was never part of God's original plan and that sex in itself, no matter who is doing it or how, is a sin. In Genesis Chapter 2 Verse 25 we read that Adam and Eve were both naked and unashamed. From this we gather that they don't know what their nakedness is or what can be done with their naked bodies. In Chapter 3 Verse 7 after Adam and Eve have eaten from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil the "eyes of them both were opened and they knew that they were naked." Then they sewed fig leaves together and covered themselves. Now that they have eaten from the tree and they know what sin is they are ashamed of their bodies because they realize their bodies can be vessels of sin. Later, God asks them why they are hiding their bodies and demands to know if they have eaten from the tree. This tells us that God never intended for Adam and Eve to know what nakedness is or to know what their bodies were capable of. It isn't until Chapter 4 Verse 1 after Adam and Eve have been cast out of the Garden of Eden that they have sex. From this we can conclude that all sex is sinful and God never intended for any of us to have sex.
For those of you who think my logic is flawed because the Bible refers to Adam and Eve as husband and wife and mentions them lying with one another before this happens I would like to point out that the Bible is filled with foreshadowing. Almost everything that happens in the Bible is mentioned at least once before the Bible actually comes to telling its story. In other words, the Bible will allude to things that have not happened yet and will later tell the story in full and explain how the events took place. I find it obvious that's what's happening here as well.
Since sex is sin and no sin can be more sinful than any other sin then it is absurd to condemn anyone based on what type of sex they have. None of us have the right to point fingers and say, "Your sin is worse than mine," we all just need to atone for our own sin and move on with our lives.
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
Tranny Sex
I have been avoiding this topic for a long time, but I can't avoid it forever and I have a friend who suggested it so I'm just going to do my best. Basically, this topic is huge. There are almost an unlimited amount of sub-topics under the main topic of sex so of course I can't cover it all in this one blog post. However, I would like to try to touch on what most people seem to be curious about which is how do non-op or pre-op Transmen have sex (Since I'm not a Transwoman I don't feel I can speak for them).
First of all, everyone is different and not every Transman will want to have sex the same way. Some Transmen won't want their genitalia touched at all, some will want only their clit's fondled, and others will be comfortable with everything being touched. It's important to talk to the person that you are with and make sure you are compatible. By that I mean you both want the same things or at least can agree on how to have sex to make you both happy. Also, keep in mind that while some Transmen want to be with women and would be considered straight some Transmen want to be with men and are therefore gay.
For Transmen that wish to penetrate there are several options. You can simply use your fingers, you can use a hard packer, you can use a strap-on, or you can use a strapless strap-on. Fingers are a great option because you can target the g-spot specifically, you have a wider range of and greater control over the rhythm, and you can orally stimulate your partner at the same time. The draw-back is that your arm can get tired too quickly, you can't go very deep, and you don't get the same sensation of having sex as a man that you would if you were thrusting. If you do want that sensation you can try one of the other methods.
A hard packer is one way to get the sensation of having cis sex. A hard packer is a device that you use to pack your pants so that you have a bulge like a penis and some even have a stand-to-pee device included. They are different from soft packers in that they usually are longer and they are stiffer so that they can be used during sex. The drawbacks to hard packers are that they can be too long and stiff so that you walk around looking like you have a hard on all the time and if you buy a smaller or less stiff model it might not work as well for sex. Also, the harnesses for them can be quite expensive. Therefore, a lot of people prefer to use a soft packer and use a strap-on for sex.
Strap-ons are very versatile and come in many different shapes, sizes, and even colors. Some even have vibrating functions to enhance the pleasure of the receiver. Others, called dual pleasure strap-ons, have nubs, bumps, ticklers, and vibrators to give pleasure to the wearer as well. The problem with a lot of strap-ons is that the actual straps are not well made and do not keep the device in place. Even if you can get one that you like with tight, secure straps you might not like the way the straps look. That's why some Transmen prefer what are called strapless strap-ons.
A strapless strap-on is a dildo with an extra phallic nub coming off the base at a right angle. This short, round nub, for lack of a better word, is what goes in the "wearer" and the phallus comes out between the legs and protrudes like a penis would. This is the most lifelike of all the options and can be very pleasurable to both partners. The wearer is able to receive sensation from the inserted part and from the phallus shaft rubbing on the clit and genitals. Some also come with vibrating bullets that both partners can feel. However, there can be two main problems with this option. First, it's important to do a lot of research to find out what model is best because the nub can be uncomfortable if it's not shaped right and if it's too small it might simply slip out. Also, you shouldn't use this model if you are very dysphoric about your body and won't be comfortable with the fact that it is inserted.
Of course, these are not the only ways of having sex with your partner and you can use any toy you would like or not use any toys at all. These are just the basic ways to mimic the way that cis people have sex. Obviously, no matter what method you choose you will have to do a lot of research and talk openly with your partner so that you make the best choice for both of you. In the end, go for the least complicated method and make sure you are both having fun. After all, that's what it's all about.
Good night! ;D
Saturday, March 1, 2014
Privacy vs Exposure
As a transman I am perpetually caught in a social struggle that all members of the LGBTQ society face; should I maintain my privacy for my own sake or enhance the exposure of the community at large for everyone's sake. I think it's pretty obvious what I've chosen, but now I think it's important to explain why.
On every transgender site I have ever been to or every transperson's blog/vlog I have ever seen I am bombarded with a list of questions that are off limits to ask someone who is trans. I find this utterly ridiculous and counter-intuitive. There is only one question you should never ask a transperson and that's "What is your real name?" First of all, my real name is whatever I identify as and it doesn't matter if I chose it myself or my parents gave it to me, it's not going away. Lot's of people change their name for all kinds of reasons. My aunt hated her name and changed it, you don't see people giving her grief. And when a woman gets married and changes her last name you don't see people saying, "Oh that's his name, what's your real name?" It doesn't work that way.
Putting that one question aside, you are pretty much free to ask me whatever you want. This isn't a get out of jail free card that means you can be rude or use me as your psych experiment, but if you are polite and genuinely interested in me or trans topics I'll do my best to answer. The reason I do this is because I want the general population of straight/cis people to understand what trans is and know what trans people are like. That way they don't feel baffled by us and walk around thinking we are abnormal freaks that are beyond understanding. It also bothers me when I see people getting mad when cis people ask questions because now that cis person is still confused by trans and on top of that they now think that trans people are hostile. You have just given that person a worse view of the trans community at large and they are going to tell everyone they know about the rude tranny they met the other day.
I'm not saying you have to answer every question, or allow people to pry beyond your comfort level, but you should never tell a person that their question is invalid or wrong in some way or that they should never ask anyone that. We all have our own limits and your's are not the same as another person's. Just politely explain that you are not comfortable with answering that question and then let them know about all the resources they can use to find out more if they are interested. For example, you can tell them about websites like wehappytrans.com or you can tell them about your favorite blogger or vlogger (cough, cough).
Basically, I want cis people to know as much about trans issues and trans lifestyles as possible that way they won't be confused by us or frightened of us or spread misinformation about us. It's important for cis people to temper their excitement and use common sense when asking questions to remain polite, but it's equally important for trans people to understand that every answered question is another opened mind.
On every transgender site I have ever been to or every transperson's blog/vlog I have ever seen I am bombarded with a list of questions that are off limits to ask someone who is trans. I find this utterly ridiculous and counter-intuitive. There is only one question you should never ask a transperson and that's "What is your real name?" First of all, my real name is whatever I identify as and it doesn't matter if I chose it myself or my parents gave it to me, it's not going away. Lot's of people change their name for all kinds of reasons. My aunt hated her name and changed it, you don't see people giving her grief. And when a woman gets married and changes her last name you don't see people saying, "Oh that's his name, what's your real name?" It doesn't work that way.
Putting that one question aside, you are pretty much free to ask me whatever you want. This isn't a get out of jail free card that means you can be rude or use me as your psych experiment, but if you are polite and genuinely interested in me or trans topics I'll do my best to answer. The reason I do this is because I want the general population of straight/cis people to understand what trans is and know what trans people are like. That way they don't feel baffled by us and walk around thinking we are abnormal freaks that are beyond understanding. It also bothers me when I see people getting mad when cis people ask questions because now that cis person is still confused by trans and on top of that they now think that trans people are hostile. You have just given that person a worse view of the trans community at large and they are going to tell everyone they know about the rude tranny they met the other day.
I'm not saying you have to answer every question, or allow people to pry beyond your comfort level, but you should never tell a person that their question is invalid or wrong in some way or that they should never ask anyone that. We all have our own limits and your's are not the same as another person's. Just politely explain that you are not comfortable with answering that question and then let them know about all the resources they can use to find out more if they are interested. For example, you can tell them about websites like wehappytrans.com or you can tell them about your favorite blogger or vlogger (cough, cough).
Basically, I want cis people to know as much about trans issues and trans lifestyles as possible that way they won't be confused by us or frightened of us or spread misinformation about us. It's important for cis people to temper their excitement and use common sense when asking questions to remain polite, but it's equally important for trans people to understand that every answered question is another opened mind.
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